Saturday, January 5, 2008


today i escaped from artoll (and a bit from myself).
actually my plan was to stay there for two weeks. but now i changed my plans and decided to stay there when my friend rachael from england arrives together with two other friends, which will be on wednesday next week.
i can´t exactly tell what the reasons are. i feel quite confused about that.
the athmosphere had been quite strange, it was so fuckin quiet. actually i thought that a few more people would be there like two years ago.
i spent two days in my studio-space there, made some sound-recordings, worked on cpf, read and wrote a bit here and there and felt more and more numb, isolated and blocked/stuck.
i found it quite hard to be focused on myself that much.
actually this does not scare me, because i know about me that sometimes these kind of feelings are part of my artistic process.
i often have to deal with that feeling of emptiness after i finished a project and before new ideas and new work come up. its a kinda going back to zero, going back to my base and (hopefully) start again.....actually that´s not bad....but....i don´t know....the last days had been quite strange......don´t know why.....

i also missed my computer ! what the fuck did i do the whole day before we had computer and later the internet ?!?!?
i work a lot with it: scan drawings, work on photos and drawings, work on soundrecordings, video-editing, i do a lot of research for my projects online, write my online-blog, keep in touch with friends via email or blogs - even if i don´t like to realise it, but it seems that i feel quite lost without that fuckin machine.....

started a new project with a guy from bruxelles, belgium. its a kinda sound-mailart thing. we send each other sounds on a more or less regular basic once a month and make tracks out of it.
besides that we keep and send a sound-sketchbook to collect ideas, thoughts, sidenotes, writings and stuff and the cd´s of that project in it.
i hope to start something similar (but on tape) with a guy from new york soon. we will see...

started reading: night watch written by sergei lukianenko...

looking forward to meet rachael next week and to work through some stuff and hopefully have a bit more fun and inspiration than i had the last days...

looking forward to help at extrapool next monday, thuesday and maybe wednesday......

"i saw a child carrying a light. i asked him where he had brought it from.
he put it out and said: now you tell me where it is gone."
-hasan of basra-

all for now

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